Funny responses to "How are you?" Photo courtesy of Canva. Maybe you can Google it. Youre supposed to think that theyre so busy being cool that they dont have time for you. Like seriously, you hoped for him to be run over by a truck or something. Not even the fussiest, or clingiest person in the world would expect a dead person to reply to them. You look tired. Because your ass is out of this world! Conspiracy theorist group QAnon hit a bizarre milestone on Tuesday, when its supporters gathered for what they believed would be the return of the late JFK junior - who, they postured, would be. You don't want to give the same, bland answer all the time. Scientists say the universe is made up of electrons, protons, and neutrons. So, how does average sound? I'm loved! But, you should know that, I don't like you, already. You grow on peoplebut then again, so does cancer. 3. If someone clearly doesnt want to talk to you, the best thing to do is not talk to them. Humans are very complex creatures, but we're also creatures of habit who say one thing when we mean another. Still with us. 01 "I thought we were both adults but clearly, I was wrong. 8. 62. Which one you use would depend on particular circumstances, but in the example you gave, I think "still alive" probably works best. Photo by Glenna Rankin on reshot 02 "It has been a while since I've heard from you, and at this point, I'm over it." Synonyms for Still Alive (other words and phrases for Still Alive). You just have bad luck at thinking. Recognize the other person's boundaries, and try not to cross them. He was a good OP, of impeccable character. [deleted] 5 yr. ago. You don't need to miss them, because you are willing to travel to them, and kiss them. Martin has been featured as an expert in communication and teaching on Forbes and Shopify. "Ugh I was so lazy this week. Some people spend all their time on their phone. Are you flirting with me right now? Thats because Im still waiting for you. Oh, what a long list. I've Tried, but No One Listens, If I Was Any Better, Vitamins Would Be Taking Me, Better than I Was a Minute Ago, Because You're Here, Okay, Because My Name Wasn't in Today's Obituaries. 13. 74. Congrats, guys! This one is funny when you havent said anything. Break the cycle, rise above, focus on science! I had been dead for billions of years before I was born and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience. Mark Twain (author), Im not afraid to die, I just dont want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen (comedian), The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry (author), Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. Yogi Berra (baseball player), Im very pleased to be here. Hanging by a thread. Should I consider that a marriage proposal from you? You can fire back with a witty and flirty response. Then the worms eat you. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Truth is, we all have ugly experiences with our past lovers. Want to equip yourself with more responses? But it can be funny. Follow for more funny content!! It may come across as insensitive, but that's just how our current world works. Funny as phuck. 82. "The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.9% of them are made by people who are still alive." . One common excuse that people come up with when they take a while to reply is Im bad at replying. funny response to are you still alive. Is that a scar on your face? 5. Feeling confident? If you want, Ill give you a discount, baby. Im sorry. This was one of the quickest ways there was to send a message from one person to another. I dont tell you how to live your life, dont tell me how to live mine thanks. Your email address will not be published. I repeat I am plural! Privacy Policy. To contact our editors please use our contact form. Do you like nature, despite what it did to you? Oh, a thought crossed your mind? Make sure you give witty responses only to persons close to you, or you know they wont get offended by such responses. Learn more about us here. But, as soon as we feel better, that person no longer serves their purpose. Alternatively, you can let them know you are doing well but still need time to process your emotions. See more ideas about maxine, bones funny, funny quotes. 6. I dont know. Even if life is rough, be happy that you're still alive. 33 very creative insults to intellectually insult someone with your sarcasm, How to be a fun texter and make anyone laugh while reading your texts. This person is taking so long to reply, you will be waiting for geology to change before you get one. All our lives, we were taught to follow our passion. (bonus points to you if you sing it). But sometimes sending a little message before excommunication can give you the confidence boost you need to dropkick them from your mind for forever. I'm alive, whoa! Its good to see youre not letting education get in the way of your ignorance. I've come up with a compilation of funny and clever answers to the question Why are you still single?. There's no reason why you should have to express emotions to whoever asked. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. What? 10. Everyone has a different sense of humor. You are about as interesting as a documentary on dirt. But still, some people will try to satisfy their curiosity and meddle with your personal life. Often, we text some people when were at rock bottom, to try and get their help, or just have someone to talk to. His songs often parodied popular musical forms, though they usually had original melodies. Some people may have thyroid problems, but I can tell youre fat because youre lazy. My bed only has enough room for me and my dog. When a date's playing it hot and cold or you haven't heard from your crush in weeks, these witty ghosting responses will help you clear the air and your mind. This is the perfect time for you to become a missing person. Who told you that? I could never tell when someones flirting with me or if theyre just being nice. Everyone always thinks being asked how you are means your health or a general standing-but what about if it isn't? Socioeconomically? On a scale of one to punching someone in the face, I am at 7.5. My lawyer told me not to answer that question. Nice and dandy, like cotton candy. I bet if you stood on a street corner, youd make some money. "I am doing good, thank you" is basic, and you can do better than that! On a scale of 1 to 10, Id say somewhere between 1 and 10. Shooting yourself in front of the person who asked. By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. Perhaps you said something as egregious as Hey. Your 3rd @ has one shot to make a three or you die. June 14, 2022; pros and cons of stem cell therapy for knees . I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if Im not there, I carry on as usual. Patrick Moore (astronomer), He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death. HH Munro (author), My father was from Aberdeen, and a more generous man you couldnt wish to meet. Thats funny, because everyone on it is a prick. [Read: The step-by-step guide to being a funny person and make everyone love your company]. You are living proof that manure can learn to walk and talk. I have a feeling that my soulmate is somewhere out there pushing a pull door right now. Nikhil Saluja, "Immortality . 83. Call the police." 13 Quora User Definitely will catch your casual convo counterpart off guard and will probably bring a chuckle. Haha basically a sassy way to say, "I'm still alive." Nevertheless, it can be a great approach to start a lively discussion! Dave Barry (author). However, the time it takes for a puppy to grow up is a lot longer than it should take for someone to reply to your message. You're the reason God created the middle finger. 76. 8. When they play it cool, play it ice cold. My blood pressure this is an all-time classic, not the best but had to be said. He will be missed. Its not my choice, but its still a choice. He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Otherwise, how are people going to get the message that you dont want to keep answering the same questions with the same half-hearted answers? Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, well be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life. I will leave that up to your imagination. You enjoy making this girl smile and make her day with your humor. Hope you're well". How to respond to an ex asking how you are? 50. [Read: How to be a fun texter and make anyone laugh while reading your texts]. Clever comebacks not only showcase your distastethey demonstrate your intelligence, too. I am better on the inside than I look on the outside. . Just because you have a dick doesnt mean you need to act like one. It's one of the best replies to "How are you?". 41. 1. Edgar A Shoaff (author), "Death is a very narrow theme, but it reaches a wide audience." Passed into the next room and told me to tell you go fuck yourself. 14. Not Bad. #maudit # peter o'toole # happy birthdayyy # im glad youre still alive. Discover what these funny, yet morbid, jokes about burial and death have in common in this hilarious piece about "Alive Jokes". Because no one worthy has beaten me yet in a card fight! and our We cant always get what we want now, can we? How much do you charge to deliver an STD? So, it might be wise to double-check theyre still alive before you complain. "Accept the facts for what they are, and be grateful you're not being strung along or played.". Otherwise, we would still be with them today. For example, if it is a friend, you can be funny or witty. No, waitIm actually plural. This is perhaps not for the faint-hearted. I'm overqualified! If someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel much longer than it is. Liked what you just read? 1. Youre a ground-hugger. However, I dont recall anything about morons. Ever wanted to be the wise-ass who always has a comeback for everything? No one will expect to hear it, so you'll be catching your friends off guard. You nervously reply "yeah, but I'm a little busy and-", only for one person to reply "um, no one asked you. Looking for funny responses to everyday questions? StyleCraze provides content of general nature that is designed for informational purposes only. I hated you the moment I met you, and I still hate you. You should really come with a warning label. Sarcastic comebacks come in handy any time someone is behaving in a particularly annoying way. Thats why Im rooting for your penis. Physically? The foundation of any effort to get your ex boyfriend back starts and ends with the no contact rule - which means you probably shouldn't be texting with him in the first place. Maybe they like you so much that it triggered some kind of reaction that ended their life. Totally fine! On this page, I've gathered together 100 of the best. Boom. Sort: Relevant Newest # living # seth meyers # im here # its me # lnsm # tired # dead # shot # arrows # loser # hello # hi # hey # tap # listen # alive # pearl jam # eddie vedder # i'm good # i'm ok 1. You could totally take the high road: Lose their number and forget about them altogether or, you could do that after sending them a final funny (but fierce) text to bid your time together adieu. However, you can check out some of our ideas if you want to shake things up and change how you respond to how are you?. I dont have time to accommodate other human beings in my life! When someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel like an empire could have risen and fallen in that time. 84. No, they're prison pants. The government? "I'll get back to you once I'm back from my long-awaited trip to the fridge.". Virginia Woolf (author), "When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction." Are those space pants? Before you complain about anything, be thankful for your life and the things that are still going well.". Don Draper? Are you always this dumb, or are you making a special effort today? Do you have a minute? is perfect for lunch-time banter with colleagues. Now you can be! Here are some of the most humorous replies to "How are you? Without your thumbs, its unlikely you will be able to text anyone. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. On Mars, cell phone reception might not be too good. Ive had worse. 11. Not everybody may appreciate them. Although for some, traveling to your partner might not be an option. 3. 14. How do you think that I am doing? 70. Which just make the unexpected moments of levity all the more hilarious. If I had a tail, I'd wag it. Whether my maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter. Winston Churchill (politician), At a formal dinner party, the person nearest to death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. George Carlin (comedian), Dont send me flowers when Im dead. Youre totally on the same page. 1. count_scoopula 6 yr. ago. What do you say when people ask you that? Because nowadays, the industry prefers singles over albums. 93. Yes, believe it or not, it really does happen. As anyone who knows anything about human biology will know, when a woman misses her period, that is a sign she is pregnant.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,100],'grammarhow_com-box-3','ezslot_13',105,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-box-3-0'); Therefore, if she were to rely on your messages for her period, she would be pregnant by now. All you have to do is save this page, or commit to memory some of our favorite insults from the following list, and youll be all set. I died last week, since then. (Wriggle your hips) I am as happy as a tick on a big, fat doggy. If you're friendly and check in with each other here and there, reply but keep the conversation short. Im telling you, the trash gets taken out more than me. Try these OOO messages to let people know you're taking a break. Its too small to be out there all alone. To text, most of us need our thumbs. Who knows, they might just do it. I'm so sorry I expected you to acknowledge my existence after hanging out? If ignorance barrel prices go up, I want drilling rights to his head. How are you? Funny Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?" Because no one worthy has beaten me yet in a card fight! Take Your Time. Cookie Notice 7. You speak as if youre not single yourself! You'll be asked how you are almost every single day, which is why you should add some humor to your answers. But Ive also had better. You can use variations, such as, "Well enough to chat with you if you wish.". Do you really care? It could always have been worse. Spiritually? 1. Im a little busy right now, but Id love the chance to ignore you some other time. 2. Things You Should Know about Birth Control Pills 62 Beautiful Makeup Inspos for Girls Who Are Not Afraid to Play with Color "Like an echo asking a shadow to dance on a mirage, this one is even funnier when an ugly person says, My friend always says "gooder". Are you asking just to make yourself feel better? Death is inevitablesome might even say it is a terminal inconvenience or a reason to suddenly stop sinning. If you're brain-dead, you're dead. Here, there are hilarious replies, witty comebacks, flirty responses, and many other answers to this question. Why dont you tell me, you seem to have a pretty good view from there. 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass! It lets him know that you love spending time together. How impressive! Youll go far someday. But, if you do say it, it will highlight the problem. Same thing youre doing, talking to you now. However, it is best to stick to the basics with a colleague. While using humor and creativity in your responses is fun, ensure you steer clear from using puns related to religion and sensitive topics. | Are you surviving? You can put your foot in your mouth and your head up your ass at the same time! upstart loan login; jim bell siloam mission salary; . My psychiatrist says that I shouldnt discuss it with strangers. I only fall in love with anime characters. Were already married, remember?! Moving in with Roommates? Reproduction without explicit permission is prohibited. If you knock on my hearts door, I might let you in. Tell them to stop being nosy and avoid answering. He's jokingly texting if you're ok. Congratulations, sir. Me being single is just a conspiracy! I am the hurricane setting fire to the forests at night when no one else is alive or awake however you choose to see it and I live in my own flames sometimes burning too bright and too wild to make things last or handle myself or anyone else and so I run. 45. How do you want me to be? While I'd love to give you the technique behind his funny comeback I can't. He may simply be one of the quickest minds in the West. You win the internet. I was gonna try #6 "Any finer I'd be China." Unknown, "He was a great patriot, a humanitarian, a loyal friend .